Yesterday I began to prepare myself for the worst. My husband was affected especially hard by our news of no fertilization (and by the evasiveness of the embryologist to my specific question) and I knew I had to be tough. There was no way he could take the news and deal with an emotional wreck of a wife. We barely spoke the rest of the day and only ate what was around our hotel room (i.e. snacks). I didn't even want to discuss next steps yet.
Today we were able to talk more on our walk to the clinic. Misc things revolving around IVF. Typical things that I think most couples go through including questioning some of the way things were handled. Think most couples go through that when faced with bad news; stages of loss and what-not.
Once we arrived in the clinic, rather then wait for Dr. Patel (which we knew would take awhile - yesterday's doctor strike caused double duty today), my husband asked if we could go straight up to the embryologist's office. The lady in the office told us to wait and after a few minutes went into the lab. She returned shortly and I assumed she informed the embryologist that we were here.
We waited. And waited. The seconds felt like minutes. After awhile, I knew the news would be bad. If she had good news, wouldn't she rush to tell us? I tell myself that maybe she is in the middle of an ICSI procedure and can't, but the other lady looked pretty forlorn. I suspect she already knows the bad news we are waiting for.
Finally the embryologist comes out. Her expression is not one of good news. She sits and starts speaking to my husband in Hindi.
All of a sudden I hear the Hindi word for "1" twice. I perk up. Then I hear "4-6 cells"! The conversation goes on and on and I don't want to interrupt for fear something might be missed, but I'm dying to know if I am right, and if so, the quality of the embryo. (It's amazing how much information you can get with only knowing a VERY limited amount of Hindi.)
Finally there is a pause in the conversation. I'm right! My husband asks if I want to see images. We are given surgical hair covers and face masks as we head into the lab. On the computer monitor I see the one egg unfertilized and next to it one booming with smooth edged cells. No fragmentation. It's 6-7 cells now; transfer is planned for this afternoon.
Holy crap.
I'm still not going to get overly excited, there are still many hurdles, but I will allow myself to be happy for today.
Today we were able to talk more on our walk to the clinic. Misc things revolving around IVF. Typical things that I think most couples go through including questioning some of the way things were handled. Think most couples go through that when faced with bad news; stages of loss and what-not.
Once we arrived in the clinic, rather then wait for Dr. Patel (which we knew would take awhile - yesterday's doctor strike caused double duty today), my husband asked if we could go straight up to the embryologist's office. The lady in the office told us to wait and after a few minutes went into the lab. She returned shortly and I assumed she informed the embryologist that we were here.
We waited. And waited. The seconds felt like minutes. After awhile, I knew the news would be bad. If she had good news, wouldn't she rush to tell us? I tell myself that maybe she is in the middle of an ICSI procedure and can't, but the other lady looked pretty forlorn. I suspect she already knows the bad news we are waiting for.
Finally the embryologist comes out. Her expression is not one of good news. She sits and starts speaking to my husband in Hindi.
All of a sudden I hear the Hindi word for "1" twice. I perk up. Then I hear "4-6 cells"! The conversation goes on and on and I don't want to interrupt for fear something might be missed, but I'm dying to know if I am right, and if so, the quality of the embryo. (It's amazing how much information you can get with only knowing a VERY limited amount of Hindi.)
Finally there is a pause in the conversation. I'm right! My husband asks if I want to see images. We are given surgical hair covers and face masks as we head into the lab. On the computer monitor I see the one egg unfertilized and next to it one booming with smooth edged cells. No fragmentation. It's 6-7 cells now; transfer is planned for this afternoon.
Holy crap.
I'm still not going to get overly excited, there are still many hurdles, but I will allow myself to be happy for today.
YAY!!! THIS IS FANTASTIC NEWS!!!
ReplyDeleteI think an IVF standard wish is 50% fertilization so you made it!! And, you know, it only takes one!! Welcome to the TWW!
ReplyDeleteCrying tears of joy for you!! So happy, way to go!
ReplyDeleteThat is AMAZING news!!!!!! So glad to come and see this post! I felt so bad for you yesterday! I'm so glad! xo
ReplyDeleteIt only takes one!!!!
ReplyDelete