Monday, September 17, 2012

Day 8: Yay! and try not to freak out.

Had another sonogram today, more shots, met the surrogate, and went over some preliminary paperwork.

Sonogram showed 13 follicles (yay!). 5 really good size, 6 average, and 2 small. Hopefully we will get some good eggs and then embryos out of these. Right now we plan on extracting on Thursday, but Dr. P said she will confirm after my sonogram tomorrow. 

Starting to get a little worried with the timing of my husband's arrival. I recall when we were planning this trip that I commented we didn't have much buffer room for mess-up (time wise), but I didn't think much more of it. Don't think I even thought of the timing for HIS arrival at all. Saturday I realized how short we were cutting it with his arrival. He gets here on Thursday - right now I'm tentatively scheduled for egg retrieval that day. That means he will not be there when I go under, something I am NOT happy about. Think "scared" is more the word I am feeling around for. In case of emergency, we do have 2 backup samples from last time, which is  good to know, but still don't like the idea of possibly having to use them if ANYTHING goes wrong with his travel. 

Try not to freak out, Try not to freak out. 

Last time we had to go a day earlier than expected. We expected 10 days of shots (not including the trigger) and ended up with only 9. If I go on Thursday, this will mean that I only had 8 days. I think the average person goes 9-12 days. I'm hormonal and irritable at my husband right now. Even more at myself for not looking at his schedule more closely and insisting on better buffers. 

Try not to freak out. Try not to freak out. 

Ok, got that out of my system for now.

On a different note: met the surrogate today. The surrogate is 28 years old, 121 lbs and 5'3 (I think she's 5'2 1/2). She has a brightness to her eyes and is ready with a smile. Sadly, she is going through a divorce and wishes to have enough money to get her own house and have some left over to go towards her son's education. 

When people talk about exploiting the poor, I really wonder if they think of things like this. Many months ago I looked up Gujarat house/flat prices and I remember being amazed how low they were. A surrogate in the USA could NEVER buy a house for what a woman could here in India. Sure, it may be a small house/flat compared to what we are used to, but so are most of the homes I have been to here. Even in very well to do homes. A woman could not earn the equivalent of 10+ years salary for surrogacy in the USA and they could not have left over funds to educate their children. When you see the lives here that have had such a positive impact due to Dr. Patel and surrogacy, it's easy to see why she does not let her critics affect her. 

Ok, got that out of my system for now.

Please let this take this time. I don't think we could come back again for another try with my eggs. Please please please. 

Hopefully this cow gave me her blessings. I gave her and a baby cow some of my leftover Malai Kofta and rice. Actually I gave it to the calf, but then she came and took it over. I'm ok with that. Maybe I'll get double blessings. 

Boss cow

Baby cow eating bushes after a few bites of delivery


  1. Self cycling is hard work and the timing is so tricky!! Hormones running wild in a different country with a hubby not there YET. I can see how you would need to deep breathe through this one! We have used frozen sperm and got positive results, with all our attempts frozen has made no difference. Sounds like you have a great egg count, well done! Hoping for a BFP!!!!! Def feeding the cow's will help, fingers crossed for you ! Keep breathing and relax, you have done all you can x

    1. Awwww thank you so much. Your post made me feel better.

  2. I have a confession... I had always had uncomfortable feelings about surrogacy in India for the very reasons you discuss. There was something that felt like I was taking advantage of their poverty. But I see the mutual benefit as well. It can empower women to become independent in cases like yours.

    1. Yes, don't get me wrong, I am sure there are some very unscrupulous clinics in India that take advantage. That's why I think it is extremely important to research your clinic. Hopefully they will put stronger regulations in place, but unfortunately the regulations that have been proposed have nothing to do with the surrogates. I did a ton of research on Dr. Patel, but I think SCI treats their surrogates very well too.

      We were very fortunate in our case because my husband is Indian and his family lives in India. Not only did they do a lot of leg work for us, but my husband was able to talk with a room full of surrogates on several occasions. I was there too, but understood very little. Except the part where they were all laughing after he told them I snatched him up quickly. :-)


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