Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Day 1 and 2 with the doc

Some of my meds

Yesterday was my first visit with the doctor. We thought we were going to have to aspirate my cyst, but Dr. P thought we should check my hormone levels first. We would only aspirate if the hormones were off.

 Last cycle I had a 3cm cyst and my estradiol was way off. I only had 3 follicles and we had to aspirate in order to proceed and get my hormones back in line. Once it was aspirated (general anesthesia - ACK!), we saw 14 follicles. Not exactly sure how that works (were they hiding???, why were we able to see more later on the unaffected ovary?), but that made the initial panic of 3 follicles easier to deal with.

This time I knew I had a 5cm cyst walking in. Turns out it had reduced to 2cm, but I only have 5 follicles currently showing. 4 and 1. My hormone levels came back normal, so we opted not to aspirate. Dr. P ordered an AMH test, and I get the results back tomorrow. Truthfully, I am a bit horrified to get the results back from that one. The follicle thing I can not worry about and simply hope more "appear", but a bad AMH right off that bat will crush me.

We are starting off with a stronger course of meds this time, though the Gonal F is at the same range we started last time (we increased it halfway through last time). 4 shots to the belly right now. Here is the breakdown:

gonal f - 375 IU
luveris/lutropin - 75 x .2
lupride/ leuprolide - 1. mil IU
human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG): HOCOG - 1250 IU

I started researching some stuff yesterday and then I just stopped. It was too depressing and I don't think it is doing me any favors right now. Hopefully my AMH has not tanked (it was 1.7 in February) and then I can be cautiously hopeful. Not even sure if cysts can affect AMH, but I'm too afraid to keep looking. 

Today I'm ok. Got shots in the belly and then socialized a bit with some other patients. For some reason, buying dog food to leave for homeless dogs (I especially worry about the lame ones) made me feel better. I don't know why, it just did. Maybe because it gives me a little bit of control or maybe it's because I feel like I can do a little tiny something to help. Right now I need a super simple way to make myself happy and that did it. I'm sure there are plenty of more laudable things I could be doing right now, but that comes with such complications at times and often tons more stress. 

I'll confess that in the last few weeks, I have, on occasion, semi-prayed. Given my atheist/agnostic ideology, this is quite complex to me internally. Not posting this because I want I bunch of comments regarding religion (quite the opposite), I just thought since it is part of my journey that I better fess up. If you are religious and are reading this, feel free to send your prayers, good vibes, or whatever else my way. I need all the help I can get. :-)

That's it for now. 

14 comments:

  1. Best of luck with your cycle! I hoping for the best outcome for you. xo

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  2. Good luck - I know exactly what you mean about not wanting to Google too much, my best advice is don't trust or listen to Dr Google, he's not helpful as a Dr and it will just scare you which is pointless. Whatever happens you'll be either elated if it's good or crushed if it's bad, knowing risks of some things befroehand doesn't always help at all - it just means that your'e stressed ALL the time and get little or now enjoyment from life.
    I know what you mean about praying, I started praying to mother universe (who I believe in) after my Fertility journey started.
    Hugs to you, stay strong you're doing so very well and you're being so brave xxx

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    1. Yea, I'm normally a research fanatic, but I need to just stop looking at the odds. It is what it is.

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  3. I am with you in my thoughts!!! Big hugs from Sweden!

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  4. That's great that your cyst is not a problem cyst and you can continue on with the cycle!! Best of luck and keep us updated.
    How is feeding the dogs going?

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    1. I didn't feed the pack that I walk by everyday. Think they might break into fight if there was a sudden food supply and they hangout near a bunch of vendors. I tried to look for opportunities where there weren't a lot of people, but a needy dog. 1 dog got spooked, but another one by a temple I visited was more than happy to take some off my hands. I looked at him, he looked at me, and then I think he realized I was going to give him food. He waited why I sat some on the ground and then politely went up to started eating.

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  5. hey hun, im a little behind on blogs, just catching up, so pleased you made it to India and the pesky cyst is at bay, keeping everything crossed for you big hugs x

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  6. Good Luck, all three of our children were born in Gujarat with the help of Dr. Patel.

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  7. I will be in India after October 7th, with a film crew for our TV show, and will be headed to Gujarat at some point please let me know if you will still be in town.

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    1. Doubtful that we will, but if we are fortunate for a positive, then we will probably come back and forth a couple of times.

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